DD walks into the kitchen where I am happily sitting at my desk, reading blogs on my laptop. She is obviously looking for something to eat, and makes a beeline for the fridge.
Me: Be careful you don’t step in the water over there.
DD (looking down): There’s water? Where?
Me: On the mat in front of the kitchen sink.
DD (still looking down and now carefully inspecting said mat): Where on the mat? I don’t see it.
Me: I’m not sure, but it’s there. I couldn’t see it either.
DD (straightening up and peering suspiciously at me): If you couldn’t see it, how do you know it’s there?
Me: Because I spilled it there. I thought the watering can was empty, but there was still some water in it and I spilled some of it there when I went to put it away.
DD (now incredulous): WTF, Mom?!? You spilled water and you didn’t wipe it up?!? And now you’re telling me that there may or may not be water on the mat and if there is, you don’t know where it is exactly?
DD (completely exasperated at this point): This is like telling someone that they are going to get their arm ripped off in this room, but you don’t know what’s going to get them or what direction it’s coming from or when it’s coming, but you just wanted them to know anyway! What is WRONG with you?!?
Me: I just didn’t want you to step in the water like I did.
DD: YOU stepped in the water that YOU spilled and didn’t wipe up?
DD: Oh, that’s all right then.
She opens the fridge and proceeds to take food out to make herself a sandwich.