At PG’s apartment the other day, he went to put a plastic bag away. We’d just gone to the drugstore to pick up a couple of small items he needed, like ink for his printer and a birthday card for his niece. He opened the utility closet in his kitchen, where he keeps his extra bags, and I could not believe what I saw in there!
Extra bags just doesn’t cut it. There weren’t just smaller bags in, say, a larger plastic bag, like a garbage bag. No. This closet was absolutely filled with plastic bags from the floor right up to the ceiling. You could not actually see anything in this closet except for probably several hundred plastic bags. You could say that this closet was overflowing with plastic bags – and in fact, several spilled out onto the floor as PG stuffed the newly-acquired bag in there.
It may just be that I have led a sheltered life, but I honestly have never seen anything like that before. I mean, obviously, we all have far too many plastic bags stowed away somewhere in our homes, but an entire closet-ful??? And just tossed carelessly into that closet, not even an attempt to stuff them into a box or bigger bag (or five)???
And who even HAS that many bags? And WHY? Does PG not know that a plastic bag can be reused? Did it never occur to him that a plastic bag can be recycled? How LONG has this been going on?
I guess I stood there with my mouth agape, because as he nonchalantly picked up the bags that had fallen and crammed them into the closet and shut the closet door, he looked over at me quizzically and said, “What?”
I squeaked something about never having seen so many plastic bags in one messy pile before, and how did this happen, and why do you do that!?! PG told me that he simply couldn’t use them up fast enough, so he just tossed them into the closet. I sputtered that he didn’t have to keep collecting the damn bags, that he could reuse some every time he went grocery shopping. He responded that yes, he could do that, but he usually picked up his groceries on his way home from work so he never had bags with him.
“So bring bags with you when you leave for work in the morning! Make sure you always have a bunch of bags in the car! Give ME some of your bags – I’ll use them! Or put them into recycling!” I exclaimed. “This is just RIDICULOUS!”
He shrugged. This just wasn’t a big deal to him. So he had a few hundred plastic bags spilling out of a closet. So what? And I shouldn’t worry about it either, as it didn’t affect me.
“You are a hoarder!” I finally yelled. “A plastic bag hoarder!”
PG didn’t like that much, but he didn’t really have any defense. To my mind, a person who collects and keeps totally unnecessary stuff that is threatening to take over their living space, yet who refuses to get rid of any of it, is quite likely to be a hoarder.
So it could be worse, but there it is.
I am dating a plastic bag hoarder.