Parking woes

Dear Neighbours,

You are generally pretty decent people, I’m sure. We have only ever chatted impersonally a few times, mostly because I don’t believe that just because people live next door or across the street they have to be best friends. You may think I’m an unfriendly snob. I don’t care. I have enough friends. I’m not looking for any more at the moment.

I know that you have teenage boys. I have no problem with most teenage boys – not generally. Yours are not particularly noisy or nasty or rude or anything like that. They are just regular kids. They may even be very nice kids, I don’t know. My contact with them has been minimal, since they are teenagers, after all, and don’t generally talk to other adults.

However, your teenage boys are now driving. They have their own cars now. They have friends with their own cars now. And that is a problem.

I’m sure you have noticed that we live in a triplex and we share a driveway. The driveway is not wide, nor is it permitted to park in this driveway. In fact, there are two signs, one on a post and the other on the asphalt itself, that clearly state “No parking”, both in words and in symbols. This rule is for two reasons that I have been able to discern: 1) the driveway needs to be kept clear for fire safety access and 2) we residents need to have access to our own garages. Simple, no?

What I am wondering is, have your teenage boys and their friends ever learned to read? Or, for that matter, have you? Because your teenage boys and their friends frequently park their cars in this driveway – not even in front of your own garage, I might add. More in front of MINE. This is an enormous problem because it means that DD and I often cannot get into our own garage.

DD and I live on the corner, which means that we must make a rather wide turn to get into our garage. Then I drive straight in, while DD must back her car in. She must do this so that we can leave enough space between our two cars in order to actually open the driver’s door and enter or exit our cars. Although my garage is a double garage, it is not overly wide, so this is the only way that we can park without dinging our respective car doors all the time. And for DD to back in, she needs to pull forward past our garage, further into the driveway. Which your idiot boys and their friends are often blocking. Occasionally with YOU standing out there talking to said boys. You don’t seem to get it. If the boys are too dumb to figure out that they are blocking the way for someone else, YOU need to tell them to get their effing cars out of the way. In fact, if they can’t understand the concept, YOU need to tell them to park their effing cars legally, like on the street.

I have spoken to the boys. DD has spoken to the boys. It hasn’t made much difference. They still don’t comprehend. They say things like, “I’ll only be here a minute” or “I’m just leaving” and they continue to park there. I don’t care what their excuse is. They don’t know if or when I will need to get into or out of my garage, do they? And DD and I should not have to ask them to move their vehicle almost every single time we want to come or go ourselves. So be a parent and don’t allow them to park there. Just don’t. The street is very, very close, just on the other side of the building. Make them park there. There is room. If there isn’t, tell them to park further away, around the corner. Those kids don’t get enough exercise nowadays anyway, so a two minute walk to your front door won’t kill the little darlings.

Thank you for your cooperation.


PS – When you wash your stupid ginormous SUV next time, do you think that you could keep it in front of your own damn garage too? I know the thing is abnormally large, but I’m sure it will fit there nicely if you just learn the size of it and drive forward a bit. I would also appreciate it if you didn’t dump your recyclables in my blue box every week, too. You CAN request a bigger box from the city, you know.


11 responses to “Parking woes

  1. I’ve lived in a variety of neighborhoods and there is always one lousy neighbor. Why is that? They want to park right in front of your house or they want to be really loud or they don’t take care of their yard or they have horrible little bratty kids from hell. I could go on but I’m sure we all know what I mean. We’ve called cops on different neighbors a couple of times and usually it ends up solving the problem and if the cops aren’t complete idiots they don’t tell the offending neighbors who complained or even that anyone did. One time, the cops just told the people he was cruising the neighborhood and noticed that they were parked in a no parking zone…so, he gave them a ticket & a lecture. They stopped parking in front of the fire hydrant then (yes, I know…amazing how stupid some neighbors are, isn’t it?).

  2. Good luck with that. Neighbors can be such a touchy thing especially if they have a sense of intitalment.

    • Linda – I know. I just don’t understand how some people just blithely do whatever they want, completely unconcerned with how it affects anyone else. Use your heads, people, we live all together in an urban area! How can you possibly think that? Oh right – you DON’T think!

  3. I’m bad at visualizing things like this, but is there any way you can put up some sort of barrier that just wouldn’t let them park there? Something that wouldn’t interfere with emergency vehicles obviously. Bad neighbours have such enormous power to make living in your own home uncomfortable. It sucks mightily.

    • XUP – i don’t think so. The way the driveway and our garage are situated, any type of barrier that I can think of would preclude our own easy access to the garage, which is the whole issue. Sigh …

  4. I agree with Jazz, sounds like you might want to call the City and get some bylaw officers in there to dole out tickets.

    Although that might in effect cause war of the neighbours, but rules are rule!

    • Pauline – I’m very much afraid that it may come to that, but I’m still hoping that a face-to-face discussion will wake them up before it gets that far. Wish me luck!

  5. Dear Neighbor, I’m a nice person, but next time you park there I’ll have the cops come and ticket the car(s). And will continue to do so every effing time there is a car there.

    • Jazz – I had a semi-heated discussion with one of the dads once, who kept repeating that he didn’t “want any trouble”, while I kept saying that this wasn’t the first time that particular car was parked there, so tell the driver to quit doing it. The ironic thing was that this dad IS a cop!

  6. It’s hard to keep peace with neighbors when they don’t respect boundaries. Maybe a small ding in the side of one of their cars from you trying to edge your way around would make a difference?

    • Wenderina – A small ding made with, say, a hockey stick just might draw their attention to the situation, yes. I’ll have to think about that …