Droppings

I was over at PG’s apartment last night. (If you must know, we were watching last week’s Formula 1 race that he had previously taped and we hadn’t yet gotten around to viewing. Yes. Really. We are so exciting.)

Anyway, we were drinking a rather lovely bottle of red wine. I quite like red wine, which made me think about other empty-calorie foods that I like. Which would lead us directly to chocolate.

“Hey, PG, do you have any chocolate in the house?” I asked hopefully.

“Yeah, that chocolate bar from last weekend that you didn’t finish. It’s in the fridge,” he answered.

Oooooh! Last weekend’s chocolate bar leftovers!

Of course I leaped up and fetched it.

It was a Lindt chocolate bar, so it was tasty, expensive chocolate. I also happen to enjoy the hardness of chocolate straight out of the fridge – I love that satisfying snick as I snap a bite off.

As I came back from the kitchen, PG moved out to the balcony. He said he was hot. I think he was just nosy about what was going on at the pub across the street, but whatever.

I joined him on the balcony, savouring my chocolate. We leaned on the railing, gazing across at the pub, thinking our separate thoughts. One of my thoughts was that I should really be polite and share my delicious chocolate. So I offered and he accepted. I broke off a small chunk and he leaned forward for me to pop it into his mouth. (We were apparently channeling those nauseating couples who feed each other. We do not normally do that. Honestly!)

Except that I intended to give him the whole piece and he intended to only bite off half of it. So the rest of the chocolate that didn’t make it into his mouth tumbled to the sidewalk three floors down.

Both of us stared down at it for a long while. My chocolate. Gone.

Without a word, we went back inside. Fortunately, there was just a little more chocolate left, but I still mourned wasting even one small piece of it. I mean, it was really fine quality chocolate! However, it was an accident, and it wasn’t really serious in the grand scheme of things, so I forgot about it soon enough.

But when I left his place a couple of hours later that night, I hunted for that piece of chocolate on the sidewalk. And I found it! I picked it up and examined it. It looked okay. I gave it a perfunctory brush. I considered what to do next.

I still can’t quite believe this, but I ate it.

And I’m still alive. So far.

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6 responses to “Droppings

  1. Jazz – I’d completely forgotten about George and the trash can éclair! That was hilarious and way funnier than me quietly snarfing down my own chocolate off the sidewalk.

    XUP – So you are saying that I am just ahead of my time – a trendsetter, in fact? Good to know!

  2. OMG! And that’s all I will say about the sidewalk chocolate. However, I did want to point out that red wine and dark chocolate are not empty calories at all. They are both full of lovely bioflavanoids and antioxidants — very important stuff. (And have you heard of chocolate and wine pairing parties? They’re the latest thing.)

  3. Were you channeling George Costanza with his eclair from the trash can at the time?

    Um… well. Remind me to send you some chocolate­ so you don’t have to eat it off the street….

  4. Waste not. LOL. I think I only would have done that for Lindt. 🙂

    • VioletSky – Somehow I just KNEW that you of all people would approve of picking up and eating my own chocolate off the sidewalk!

      Pauline – You’re absolutely right: I certainly wouldn’t have done it for, say, Hershey’s chocolate (not that I would buy that anyway – I’m a bit too much of a choco-snob for that!).

  5. “Without a word, [he] went back inside”…….. a real gentleman would have at least offered to go buy another luscious Lindt bar.

    Had I just happend on a piece of perfectly good chocolate on teh street I would have said “ewwwww”, but somehow, what you did seems perfectly reasonable to me.