I wear contacts. Not earth-shattering news, I know, but important to me. I’ve been wearing them for four years, but I’ve worn glasses for many years before that, since I was eleven. My glasses were for distance, but when I hit the big 4 – 0, my close-up vision started to be a problem. It got to be quite a pain to whip the glasses on to watch TV, whip the glasses off to read the TV Guide, for example. I tried bifocal contacts, but I found that I couldn’t see print as clearly as I needed to, so my ophthalmologist got me into mono-vision. This means that I have one contact for distance vision, the other for close-up. It works very well for me.
I recently had a checkup with said ophthalmologist. My prescription hasn’t changed for the four years I’ve had contacts, so I was pretty much in and out of the office, armed with another year’s supply of contacts.
I opened the new packages about ten days ago. And somehow, my distance vision wasn’t quite as clear with these new lenses as I was used to. At first, I attributed it to being crazy, then being tired, then old contacts that needed to be changed more frequently (like every day, but I’m cheap, so I wear them for two days usually), then I just thought I got an inferior package of contacts. After all, my prescription was exactly the same, so I should have been seeing exactly the same, too.
Today, Porsche Guy and I were sitting around, drinking Bailey’s and coffee, discussing the GPS he bought me for Christmas. My left contact was bothering me, so after poking at it for a while, I decided I’d better take it right out, inspect it and clean it, the reposition it in my eye if all seemed well. Of course, watching me remove it creeped PG right out (it didn’t occur to me to slip discreetly into the bathroom to do this), then it ripped as I attempted to remove it, then once I got both pieces, I dropped them somewhere in the living room.
Then I headed upstairs to my bathroom to get a new contact, muttering that this was going to throw off my system, since now I’d have one contact less from the left eye box than the right eye box (if that even makes sense!). I reached into the cupboard, grabbed the top two boxes in the stack, as I couldn’t be bothered to actually look carefully and only take out the left eye box. Naturally the top box was the right eye box, so I moved on the the other one – on which I noticed, for the first time, a small round red R sticker. Right eye?? I looked carefully at the other box I’d taken out. Another small round red R sticker. Huh??
Apparently, for the past ten days, I have been wearing a right contact in my left eye.
This explains a number of things, but not why it took me so long to figure it out.