The Wimmin met for Unbook Club the other night. We’re quite a diverse group, and conversations are always wild-ranging and free-flowing, especially as the evening wears on and more wine is consumed. This particular evening fit that description perfectly. Laine decided to share again (for the benefit of those who were too drunk to comprehend it the first time she explained it) her theory on lesbians.
According to Laine, being heterosexual makes sense biologically: Y chromosome in man meets X chromosome in woman. Male homosexuality is understandable because of those Y chromosomes that men possess. However, female homosexuality does not cut it because women have no Y chromosomes. She is of the opinion that yes, women can love each other, but sex is really out of the question. She believes that lesbians are just deluding themselves that they are sexually attracted to one another, that they simply can’t because they lack that crucial Y chromosome.
The rest of us howled with laughter, but she stood her ground. She absolutely insisted that lesbians may love other women, but sexual desire isn’t biologically possible for them. We argued points such as, “How would you know anything about how a lesbian thinks or feels? You’re straight!” and “So all those millions of lesbians all over the world are LYING about having sex?!?” and “Who says love and sexual desire have anything to do with biology? What about the emotional component?” and of course, the show-stopper, “You’re so full of shit!”
We decided we should have a lesbian come over one night and give a talk to our little group so we’re properly informed on the subject. But we’re afraid Laine might beat her up.