Look both ways

About a year ago, I had a confrontation with the driver of the car that almost knocked me down as I was crossing the street. With the green light. With the pedestrian signal in my favour. In a crosswalk. In broad daylight.

I was SO ANGRY! That cow came so close to me before screeching to a halt that I had time to consider where it would hurt the least when her bumper hit me, and to make my decision to jump up right before impact because I thought that way she wouldn’t run me over, that I would roll up over the hood of the car (and possibly smash my head into the windshield. But I didn’t have enough time to consider that possibility, apparently.).

Anyway, she stopped a scant 20 or 30 centimetres from me, and as I came back down from jumping, I slammed my two hands forcefully on the hood of her car. Heart pounding, I glared at the stupid woman.

She rolled down her window. “Sorry.”

Sorry. That’s it? She didn’t sound at all sorry. I stayed right in front of her car and started screaming at her.

“Sorry?! That doesn’t quite cut it! You just about fucking KILLED me, you idiot! How did you ever get your license?!”

She stared at me balefully. “I didn’t see you. Sorry.” Deadpan.

“No kidding you didn’t see me! I guess you didn’t see the pedestrian light or the crosswalk either, did you!”

By this time, cars were backing up behind her. People in cars and on the street were staring. I stayed in front of her and kept shouting. I just couldn’t believe that she expressed so little remorse. I couldn’t believe that I of all people had come so very close to being hit by a car, a car driven by someone who seemed to be that stupid that she didn’t realize the gravity of what she had almost done.

The light changed. People started honking. I gave her one last “You’re a moron!” and dashed to the median in the middle of the road. She continued on her merry way, followed by the vehicles that had been stopped behind her. When the road was clear again, I scurried to the opposite side and stood there for a few minutes to catch my breath before heading up the hill and continuing home myself.

I was upset about that for a long time, mainly because of her non-reaction, not really because I almost got smacked by a car. If it had been me, I told myself, I would have been absolutely guilt-ridden and anguish-filled, and I would have been shaking for a week.

Then today, driving home, I was at a busy intersection waiting to turn left. There was a gap in the oncoming traffic. I started to go. And there was a woman walking in the crosswalk. And I didn’t see her right away. I did stop safely though, albeit a bit more suddenly than I would have liked, and she stopped too. She gave me a look, I put both my hands up and mouthed, “I’m sorry!”, and she finished crossing the street safely without giving me another glance.

Some people are just so zen. I, on the other hand, trembled almost all the rest of the way home.